Caution. Graduation events may be hazardous. – SCN Encourager 6/5/2013
My “roaming eyes” and the best explanation I can muster…
The other night I experienced the longest drive home. Ever. Or at least it felt like it.
Although only my wife and I were in the car, I knew I should’ve taken a cab.
Husbands can always sense when trouble’s brewing.
“It’s shameful,” she said. “And In front of all those people. You and your ‘roaming eyes.’ I thought you were going to start drooling.”
“Oh, c’mon. You’re over-reacting. This isn’t a big deal.”
“Well, it’s a big deal to me. I’d like to believe you’d have enough pride to keep your cravings and your leering eyeballs in check.”
“Oh, c’mon. You’re over-reacting.”
“You think so? I’m over-reacting? Just ask anyone there who was trying to talk with you tonight. You weren’t looking at them. You were looking all around them. It’s like you’re an addict or something.”
“Oh c’mon.”
“Face it. You’ve got a problem. Our friends noticed it tonight I’m sure. Your roaming eyes were totally embarrassing. Here we were – with friends we haven’t seen in ages – and you act this way. Why couldn’t you just enjoy their company? Why can’t you just admit you’ve got a big problem?”
“A big problem? You’re kidding, right?”
“OK, stay in denial, Tom. I’m trying to have an honest talk with you and this always happens when I do. Don’t you at least get where I’m coming from?”
“Mmm. Can’t say I do. Where?”
“Well, I care for you… and your behavior makes me concerned about the future. Please don’t brush off what I’m saying.”
“I’m not ignoring you. I just don’t believe I have a problem, that’s all.”
“How can you even say that? You know this is not the first time we’ve talked about this… this kind of behavior. And you still put it on full exhibition at your brother and sister-in-law’s get-together tonight – even after we spoke about it ahead of time.”
“Can we just change the subject? I’m really tired. I didn’t do anything wrong. All I did was look. And besides, most of what happened tonight is partly your fault, too. You shouldn’t make a federal case out of it.”
“What?!? Now, I’m the one to blame? I’ve got to hear this!
“OK, it’s simple. Consider my side for once.”
“Make it quick.”
“OK, when I first saw that invitation to the open house for our niece, I couldn’t help noticing that it was a ‘dessert buffet’ event.”
“Go on.”
“So when we arrived at tonight’s open house, you noticed that most of the folks we knew were out on the porch, and you said wanted to go sit by them.”
“So…?”
“Well, all of the desserts were inside the house. I think you deliberately steered us out there knowing full well that only the ‘veggie bar’ was out there, so yeah… you were the one that trapped me out there, forcing me to look around at all of the other desserts that people had. Accuse me of ‘roaming eyes’ all you want – but I couldn’t help it.”
“Remember, all I said was to keep your weight in mind and to go easy on all that sugar. You can’t blame me for wanting you to live longer.”
“Yeah, I know. You’re right. I’m sorry that I acted like a sweet-toothed half-crazed desperado.”
“So this won’t happen again.”
“Well, I can’t promise that. We still have four more graduation open houses to get to this weekend!”
The moral of this story: As school leaders and communicators, we now have many graduation related events on our calendars. Each one has its own temptations. Stay strong, friends.
Tom Page, SCN
